The Kitchen Sink

What if you could apologise and say goodbye?

One episode from the end of the new season, Black Mirror hits us with a gut punching exploration of life, love and loss through the episode Eulogy, which had already been hyped up to be the gem of the season due to the involvement of paul giamatti, and in a season packed with such interesting, profound stories, Eulogy manages to stand out completely from the rest. 

In this episode, we meet Phillip, an older man living by himself in Cape Cod, Massachusetts, who receives a call from a company named Eulogy, which specialises in using artificial intelligence to curate a unique immersive memorial, that being how he learns that Carol Royce, once Carol Hartman, has passed away, and her daughter Kelly Royce has hired Eulogy to help her organise her mother’s funeral. 

Phillip is taken aback, but agrees, and he instantly receives a package delivered by a drone, the first piece of high-tech we see in the episode, which contains a small device called a guide disk that is supposed to be placed, you guessed it, on the temple, and will assist him in collecting memories of Carol. 

Phillip is incredibly sceptical, as he hasn’t thought of Carol in a long time, burying her in the depths of his mind and labelling her a cruel, insensitive woman who did nothing but hurt him, in order to cope with his pain. 

He’s incredibly dismissive at first, telling the AI to skip the guide and go directly to the point, but try as he might he cannot remember Carol’s face or features, and the guide won’t help him as it could interfere with his memories of her. That’s when the device suggests he look for pictures of her, and as he doesn’t have any digital ones due to the fact he and Carol knew each other before the digital age, he digs through his cellar to find old photos from the time they knew each other. 

The first photo takes us back to 1989, when Carol and Phillip were living at The Coop, a squatter co-op community of artists and free thinkers in Brooklyn. Unfortunately, she doesn’t have a face in the photo as her back is turned to the camera, but we can see, by the way young Phillip looks at her, that he’s already attracted to her. The Guide suggests they enter the picture, which can be achieved with the help of the guide disk, and upon entering the photo the Guide enhances the image to note that Carol had a ring on her finger, suggesting she had been engaged before leaving home, which she never mentioned to him, although she did mention she had a relationship. 

In the second photo, they visit a party thrown at The Coop, but Phillip and Carol are nowhere to be seen, with him remembering they were actually down the hall chatting, with Phillip being aided by the music playing that night to remember how easy it was to talk to her, and how she was unlike anyone he ever knew. That, he says, was the first night they slept together. 

Neither picture can be used in the memorial, however, as they portray a bad character of the deceased.

In the third picture, we cannot see Carol, but we do see Phillip leaning on a door frame, and he states he was actually listening to Carol play a piece on her beloved cello that she had composed herself. They still cannot see her face, or hear the music, and he can’t fill the gap that would allow them to, making the door lead into nothing but a vast void. 

The Guide asks Phillip if he’d have other pictures, to which he says yes, but they will be of no help, as it turns out he has removed her face from every picture he owned, by either scratching, cutting, drawing over it or burning it off, as a result of the pain she had caused him. 

He reveals they were together for 3 years, from 1989 to 1992, and their breakup drove him to alcoholism, which took him 15 years to recover from, meaning she stole, in his mind, at least 18 years of his life, likely a lot more. 

The fourth pic was taken in Cape Cod, their first vacation together. He states his parents had a house there, undoubtedly the one he lives in now, and they wanted to get out of the city for a while. They posed together in front of a hot dog statue, and asked a passing tourist to take the photo, which annoyed Carol, as she remarked he couldn’t even put the beer bottle down for one picture, implying here there was already precedent for his addiction even while he was happy with Carol. He finally states this was the trip that made them realise they were serious. 

In the fifth picture, Carol is painting blue over a nicotine-yellow wall of their first place together, a small apartment above a piano store. She painted the letters C + P, while he took the black and white picture. He remarks by that time Carol had already joined his band, which leaves the Guide curious. 

So he brings in the sixth picture to explain. He was in a band called The Head with a man called Zeke who was the lead singer, and an unnamed man for a drummer. Carol joined the band playing the keyboard, which confuses the Guide as she seemingly loved cello so much she taught it to her daughter. We also get a tidbit about how Zeke eventually left the band and moved to Seattle, becoming famous; he reveals no recordings of their band survived as he can’t stand hearing Zeke’s voice and deems him an asshole, further proof of his ability to hold grudges against those he believed wronged him for long periods of time, since he also thought their band was good enough that they could’ve been big, even if Carol’s heart wasn’t in it. 

The Guide remarks that perhaps if he had allowed Carol to play the cello for the band she would’ve been more committed, which annoys him, making him question who could’ve coded such a difficult being as them, but the Guide responds she wasn’t coded, more generated, and when Phillip jokes she was generated by a digital asshole, we see the Guide’s feelings become visibly hurt, and Phillip apologises, showing he’s capable of recognising his mistakes at least on a small scale, and regret them.

Seventh picture, Halloween 1991. They’re at a bar together, called the Undervolt, where Phillip used to work. This time, two faces are burned off, Carol and an unknown man, who Phillip identified as a random guy trying his luck with Carol, getting angry since she was allowing this to happen right in front of him, only to have it pointed out that he was also weirdly close to another woman, Emma from The Coop, whom Carol believed Phillip was leading on. The Guide also remarks Carol seemed uncomfortable, seemingly attempting to get away from the Beetlejuice-dressed man next to her, to which Phillip retorts she could’ve gotten away from him if she wanted but she spent all night with him, another photo soon revealing that wasn’t the case, to which he mumbles was just an expression, stating the real reason behind Carol’s fight with Phillip was that he didn’t allow her to get to bed at a reasonable hour, as the next day she had an audition for the Brooklyn Philharmonic, a role which she didn’t get.

The Guide retorts that she must’ve been sad, but Phillip ignores that and states she wasn’t that sad as it ended up going well for her, since a friend of hers from The Coop, Amanda, who was English, went back home and managed to pull some strings to get Carol on the orchestra pit for The Phantom of the Opera on the West End, which Phillip boils down to some terrible tourist bullshit. 

In London, Carol sent him loads of postcards, which he blackened out with pens, and eventually they come across a picture from his birthday, taken by Emma, which reveals he cheated on Carol when she was in travelling, and although he felt it was a stupid mistake that both him and Emma would take to the grave, Carol decides to call him for the first time since she left, wishing to sing happy birthday to him from London, something that must’ve cost her a fortune, but when Emma picks up the phone, a fight ensues. 

The Guide gets angry, stating all this time he has painted Carol as the evil aggressor but he was just as bad, if not worse, and asking what Carol had done that made her such a horrible human being. 

He decides to show her. 

Apparently, they had planned for him to visit her in London a couple months after his birthday, and as the tickets had already been bought, he went, making a reservation at a nice hotel and restaurant, making it explicit to the concierge his intention to propose to her. Once there, he orders a bottle of champagne, which Carol declines, making him even more nervous. he remarks she was embarrassed of having gained some weight, but that he didn’t notice and to him she looked perfect. Eventually, he takes out the ring box and places it on the table, but as she goes silent, he demands an answer, as he claims the waitresses were all staring at them, and ends up banging his fist on the table in anger, which attracts the attention of the whole restaurant, and causes Carol to leave, making him feel completely humiliated, and he insists on paying for his champagne since he didn’t want the restaurant’s pity.

The Guide angrily talks about how he didn’t need the pity because he had enough of that for himself. It states that all Phillip has done so far is whine and moan about how Carol ruined his life, how she’s the devil incarnate, but not once did he stop to think about how she had felt, and how the reason she didn’t drink that night was because she was pregnant, with the Guide, who is revealed to be an AI version of Carol’s daughter, Kelly, complete with all her memories and personality, that has been tasked with processing all the memories of her mother for the memorial since that would’ve been too painful for the real Kelly. 

Phillip is in shock, he asks why she didn’t tell him that before, to which she responds he chose to ignore the initial guide of the disk, and he asks her about her real father, revealed to be a member of the orchestra with whom her mother had a one-night stand. She says he moved to Manchester by the time she was born, and she had met him maybe five or six times in her life, with the last one being the day he rambled to her about a rabbit-hole conspiracy theory he had found online, and having learned a few years later, that he died of Covid. 

Finally, the last photo, found in a disposable camera he bought so they could take pictures around London during his trip, shows a destroyed hotel room, a result of Phillip’s anger towards Carol’s rejection of him. He learns through the enhance feature that there was a letter on the floor addressed to him which he never saw, and desperately attempts to open it, but as it’s a simulation he cannot. However, he remembers that after trashing the hotel he went out to drink, coming back to find the maid neatly arranged all his mess into a pile that he then shoved in his suitcase, never to be touched again. 

As he discovers the letter, he finds out Carol apologised to him, revealing that she had a one-night stand with a coworker and has found out she’s pregnant. She repeatedly tells him she loves him, and that she intends to keep the baby, but didn’t know how he would react to the information, if he would still want her. She asks if he can forgive her, and wishes to talk about it, to meet her at the stage door the next day after the matinee, so they can resolve their issues, but that she understands if he cannot forgive her. 

Overcome by grief, Phillip retrieves a cassette tape recorded by Carol for him, from the time in 1989 where he used to listen to her play, and listens with Kelly to the original piece composed by her mother. 

We jump to a days later, Phillip arrives in London to attend the funeral, and he leans against the frame of the church door to watch Kelly play the piece her mother created, finally being able to see her in his mind after all these years, a bright smile on her face as she catches him staring at her through the door of The Coop. 

–

Eulogy is perhaps the strongest episode in the season, and one of the strongest overall, reminiscent of the time before Black Mirror became american property, and utilising its innocuous sci-fi element incredibly well. 

We have definitely seen a device like the guide disk before, especially this season, and their recurrence in the last couple seasons seems to imply they are a device we should be paying close attention to, perhaps because of how similar it is to technology currently in development, like Tesla’s Neuralink. But the greatest thing about this episode is that it uses a device that could, at least superficially, be considered a non-threatening AI, as it has been developed to help grieving families, much like how many people initially felt towards the Neuralink. 

It is important to remember, though, that even technology developed to help can be twisted into evil, and any watcher of Black Mirror might have felt a chill down their spine at the sight of every human present at Carol’s funeral completely brainwashed by the technology, instead of witnessing the beautiful tribute piece performed by her daughter.

In fact, Black Mirror’s insistence in showing the audience devices that can be connected to the brain by placing it on or in the human skin, seem like a loud advert against them, and hopefully we’ll see the concept developed enough to become ever more of a presence in the next season, as I believe that to be a very important warning against the current stage of technology. 

As for the meat of the episode, Eulogy touches on the very human habit of holding grudges, as well as blaming others for one’s personal failures, and interestingly, the unreliable narrator of this episode is once again a man, a theme for this season. 

Phillip, albeit overcome by the pain caused by the loss of seemingly the only long-term relationship he’s ever had, has allowed himself to shut down all other people who might’ve attempted to enter his life, losing touch with the co-op entirely, and falling into a pit of addiction that he blames Carol for, but we see time and time again that his addictive tendencies, which are often inherited genetically, were present during his relationship with Carol, through his inability to let go of alcohol even during a nice photo, his drinking of an entire bottle of champagne alone, his immediate using of alcohol as a crutch whenever he’s angry, and even his work as a bartender. 

Phillip is also a violent, manipulative man. He seems to resent Carol for getting a spot at the orchestra pit, acting as if it is beneath a real artist to play for a “tourist trap”; he seemingly sabotaged her audition for the philharmonic, on purpose or not, still refusing to admit to the consequences of his actions and playing it down as not having truly hurt her feelings; he considered the co-op to be made entirely of innocent kids who believed themselves to be artists, but weren’t; he resents Zeke, his former bandmate, for abandoning him and coming into success of his own; he deprives Carol from playing the only instrument she ever loved in his band, stating she was in agreement but later revealing her heart wasn’t in it; he bangs his fists on tables and destroys hotel rooms out of anger, and although not sober when he cheated on Carol, he still downplays it as being just a silly mistake that meant nothing and could be overcome except she didn’t want it; he accuses her of flirting with a man she seemed uncomfortable around simply because she was sitting next to him; and when he finds out Kelly’s father turned out to be a deadbeat, he blames Carol for not knowing how to choose her men, a dig also at himself. 

All of this, combined with his angry and dismissive persona and the mug we spot next to him in his desk which leads back to a rehabilitation facility, prove that Phillip has always been an angry, resentful man who disliked anyone he deemed to be more talented than him, or perhaps capable of achieving their dreams when he wasn’t, as we never find out what sort of artist he was, but it is heavily hinted at that he was an amateur photographer, which means a place like New York would be the perfect place for him to develop his craft, but unfortunately, either for lack of talent or lack of trying, he was unable to pursue his dream as a career, as that is a very competitive industry where it is difficult to stand out. 

Furthermore, it might just be that his flying out to London after such an ugly fight with Carol with a ring on his jacket pocket was an attempt to salvage the relationship by locking her to him forever, and given that he didn’t take her job at the West End seriously, it isn’t difficult to imagine that their engagement would come with the implicit desire for her to move back to the States with him, where his alcoholic tendencies would still undoubtedly catch up to him, as they were already initially present, making her stuck in a life that made her miserable. 

According to her daughter, Carol didn’t speak of that point in her life, which Kelly replies cannot have been simply because it wasn’t meaningful, likely the exact opposite, but her AI version doesn’t explicitly state that she forgave him or that his impact on her life was positive, and it is also implied that AI Kelly wasn’t programmed to judge or cry, however she does let out that she, or her mother, believed that if Phillip had known of the pregnancy, the version of him that exists in Carol’s story or that AI Kelly was able to witness would simply ask Carol to get rid of Kelly. 

Finally, Phillip is definitely a sympathetic character. His violent tendencies are almost certainly both a result of his not being able to cope with his own perceived failure and place in society, forced to see everyone else succeed, and a genetic predisposition to addiction, which caused him to lash out at everyone around him, resulting in his being alone in his old age, but his willingness to recognise his mistakes and show up for Carol’s funeral, going back to London after all this time to meet the daughter of the only woman he ever loved, proves that he is capable of change and growth, as we all are, independent of age. 

At its core, Eulogy is a story about learning to forgive, before it’s too late. Although both Phillip and Carol demonstrate they are not perfect, none of the things they did to each other were ever violent enough to be impossible to resolve, and they are both capable of growth, as indicated in the final scenes of the episode. If anything, it’s implied that Carol didn’t die with hate in her heart for Phillip, and her one gift to him, through Kelly, is ensuring he won’t either. 

It’s a deeply touching portrayal of human failings that tugs at the heartstrings and proves that there is good in all of us, and we don’t have to always be so easily manipulated by our own feelings, as well as how important it is to reach out and build community. Apart from that, Eulogy proves the thesis developed by Cameron Walker in Plaything to be wrong, there is good in humanity, and we all deserve a chance at finding that good within ourselves, even if it might be too late to make peace with those who’ve wronged us, we can still make peace with our hatred.